Xc70 Vs. Honda Civic (4Th Generation)

[matt1122]

This morning, I was sitting at a stoplight about 100 yards from a zipper merge when an '87-91 Honda Civic sedan pulls up next to me. It's beat up, clearly unmodified, and sounds like it's going to die at any moment. The driver begins inching forward constantly anticipating the light changing.

Now, normally, I don't race other vehicles to zipper merge's, however on this day I know there to be a set of big metal plates over some sort of hole in the road. The plates don't completely cover the damaged section of the road, so there is a dip before them which forces those not in a Volvo XC to slow to a snail's pace before crossing. Immediately following these plates is a 90° curve, followed by a stretch of 20 feet riddled with potholes. If you're clear of other traffic, you can safely go around all of these potholes without anyone trying to pass you on the right. If there are other cars right behind you, they will probably be assholes and try to pass you as you try to move back into the lane.

So the light turns green and I swiftly depress the throttle to about 70%. This is when the unexpected happens, he floors it and you hear the engine struggling to try to produce an epic 92 horsepower!!! "HA!," I think to myself, "NICE TRY, FATTY!" But nothing in my life before this moment could have prepared me for what was going to happen next, for as I began to pull away the other driver suddenly made his move...

"Honk honk!" his car shouted in rage as his efforts to cut me off (which in fact were a complete failure because he couldn't even get his car from one lane to the other in the time it took my car to move 30 feet) were ruined. I immediately felt a sense of panic. I did not realize that he would honk at me! "What am I going to do now?" I think to myself as he honks again, now a good 40 feet behind me. And so I did the only thing you can do in this situation. I turned up my stereo and watched his car disappear into the distance in my rear view mirror.

[Foxdc199]

Haha +1. The quality put into this write up is better than the quality put into building that civic before it came out of the factory.